Monday, November 2, 2009

I Miss My Love. She's My Baby

I'm missing Joe. I can't lie. Since we moved in together all those years ago, I think this is the longest we have been apart. It's not like we are never apart. He goes on hunting trips with his friends or the men in our family. I have gone on shopping trips with my girlfriends. Or weekend trips with the women in our family. But this time, Joe will be gone for 2 weeks!

Maybe it's just because I'm pregnant. And Emma is almost here. But I miss Joe. He is doing a great job. He calls every day. Actually, multiple times a day to check on Eva and I. We web cam once a day. That way Eva can see her daddy. And let's be honest. So I can see Joe and he can see the 2 of us.

My mom graciously offered to stay with Eva and I while Joe is gone. Everyone wanted to make sure that I would be OK. That I wouldn't go into labor while Joe was gone. And be alone with my 21 month old daughter. An hour away from our hospital. But that still doesn't help me. I miss Joe.

Not so much during the day. Eva keeps me pretty entertained. Mom also keeps my mind off of Joe. And let me be honest with you, I sleep a lot. My body is so tired. But at night, when I crawl into our bed, I miss my husband. I miss cuddling with him. I miss falling asleep in his big, strong, muscular arms.

On the 1st night, I coped. I had to. What was I going to do? The 2nd night, I spent it watching Eva sleep in her room. Until I couldn't take it any more. Then I finally went to bed. I think I slept 4 hours. On the 3rd night, I picked up Eva, out her bed, and put her in ours. Yes, every night since, I let her fall asleep in her bed. Then I put her in ours when I go to bed.

My mom isn't thrilled. We had a little argument over it tonight. It ended in me crying. Why? I don't know why. My mom thinks Eva's schedule shouldn't be disrupted. But it has been. Hello, her daddy is gone working. I know I told him to go. But still, she is used to him being around. So why can't I put her in bed with me? I sleep better. And to be honest, I am enjoying the time with her. Before I know it, Emma will be here. So why not enjoy these last few moments with Eva. Just me and her.

When Joe gets back, our schedule will get back to normal. Well, at least as normal as it can be. And then Emma will come. That is why I am cherishing these last few days and moments with Eva. I want to be able to hold my baby girl. To love her. And for both of us to get a good night's sleep. I might just be a little more emotional than normal. But she is my baby girl. I enjoy getting to watch her sleep. Playing with her and her baby doll in the morning. Reading her a book before we get up and out of bed. And I do miss my husband. Why can't we change our sleeping pattern for a few short days? ♥Anna Marie♥

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